What Do Japanese People Actually Want to Talk About With Foreigners?
Your favourite music. What weekends look like where you live. Something you noticed in Japan. The hobby you’ve recently become slightly too obsessed with.
These are useful places to start a conversation with Japanese people. The best choice depends on the person and what they’ve already shared. You don’t need an impressive question about Japanese culture to be interesting.
You also don’t need to arrive prepared to explain your country’s entire history. Your usual breakfast will do.
Our Langmate team includes Japanese members and people from several other countries, and we share a love of travel and making friends. When we think about useful conversation topics, we look for something both people can contribute to—even with limited vocabulary.
There’s some support for starting with ordinary interests. A 2024 NTT DATA Institute of Management Consulting survey of 1,088 Japanese people living in Japan identified everyday settings, including hobby gatherings and neighbourhood connections, as potential opportunities to interact with foreign residents. It gives us a practical starting point: look for something that fits into both people’s lives.
- Start with whatever they’re enjoying right now
- Your ordinary day can be interesting to someone elsewhere
- If they ask why you like Japan, give them your personal answer
- Small differences are easier to discuss than sweeping comparisons
- Street Interviews: What’s the best thing you’ve eaten during your trip to Japan?
- Recommendations work best when you’re interested enough to follow them up
- Notice which topic brings more of the person into the conversation
- A New Connection Starts Here.
Start with whatever they’re enjoying right now
A profile might mention running, fashion, gaming, or photography. Pick one detail and ask a question that leaves room for a story.
You mentioned that you’ve started running. Are you training for something, or just enjoying getting outside?
That gives someone more to work with than “What are your hobbies?” Share your connection to the topic, too:
I’ve been trying evening runs. Getting out the door is still the hardest part.
You don’t have to be equally experienced. Curiosity is enough. If they’re passionate about something unfamiliar, try:
What got you into it?
For a simple Japanese version of “What are you into lately?”, you could use:
最近、何にハマっていますか？
What are you into lately?
Their answer helps you choose where the conversation goes next.
Your ordinary day can be interesting to someone elsewhere
If a Japanese person asks about your hometown, they may be trying to picture your life.
Give them something small and concrete. What do people buy on the way to work? Where do you go when you need a break? What does a relaxed evening look like?
For example:
There’s a market near my home that gets busy in the evening. I usually go for fruit and somehow come back with dinner. Is there somewhere you like stopping after work?
That message offers a glimpse of your world and invites them to share theirs.
Photos can help, when you’re comfortable sharing them. A local dessert or a view from a public park gives you something to discuss without needing a long explanation. Keep home addresses and other private details out of the picture.
If they ask why you like Japan, give them your personal answer
You might have started learning Japanese because of a film, a musician, a memorable trip, or someone you met.
A specific answer creates more possibilities:
I started listening to Japanese jazz, and that made me curious about the language. Have you discovered any musicians recently?
Or:
I became interested in Japan through ceramics. I’d love to take a pottery class someday. Have you ever tried it?
They may share your interest. They may know very little about it. Either answer gives you a chance to learn about them.
You can also ask whether they’re interested in visiting another country. A conversation that begins with your interest in Japan can become an exchange about places you both hope to explore.
Small differences are easier to discuss than sweeping comparisons
“What’s different between Japan and my country?” is a large question. Narrow it to one experience.
When friends visit your home, do they usually bring something? In my family, people tend to arrive with far more food than anyone can finish.
Ask what happens in their household or among their friends. That gives them room to answer from experience, without having to speak for everyone in Japan.
The same approach works for birthdays, school lunches, holidays, or how people spend a rainy Sunday.
Be careful with questions that already contain a judgement. “Why are Japanese people so…?” can make someone feel that they’re being asked to defend a whole country. Describe what you noticed, then leave space for a different interpretation.
Street Interviews: What’s the best thing you’ve eaten during your trip to Japan?
At Langmate, we interview international visitors on the streets of Japan and share their real experiences on Instagram and TikTok.
This time, we met a traveler from Wales and asked:
※From Langmate official Instagram/YouTube
Food is often one of the biggest reasons people fall in love with Japan, but everyone has a different favorite. Sometimes it is a famous dish, and sometimes it is something completely unexpected.
Questions like this are also an easy way to start a conversation with Japanese people — everyone has a favorite food to recommend.
What would be your number one Japanese dish?
Watch more Langmate street interviews on Instagram 🎵
Check Langmate Official Instagram
Recommendations work best when you’re interested enough to follow them up
Ask for one suggestion that matches something you enjoy:
I like films with unexpected endings. Is there a Japanese film you’d recommend?
If you watch it, come back with a reaction. Here’s an example of how the exchange could develop:
- You: I watched your recommendation. I was confidently wrong about the ending.
- Your friend: Which character did you suspect?
- You: Almost everyone except the right person. What did you think when you first watched it?
Now you have a shared reference. You can disagree, laugh about your predictions, or suggest something in return.
That’s more useful for friendship than collecting a list of recommendations you never revisit.
Notice which topic brings more of the person into the conversation
You might prepare a question about travel and discover they’re much more interested in your pet. Follow that interest.
A longer reply, a detail they volunteer, or a question back can give you a reason to explore further. If a subject gets little response, share something else or give the conversation some space. You don’t need to keep producing questions like a quiz host whose guest is trying to leave.
For early conversations, keep questions about income, bodies, and intimate relationships out of your opening messages. Let familiarity—and the other person’s willingness to share—guide more personal topics.
You can even ask directly:
What do you enjoy chatting about? I’m happy to talk about everyday things, too.
Making Japanese friends online starts with finding something you both want to say. Choose one detail from their profile, offer a little of your own experience, and see what catches their interest.
A New Connection Starts Here.
Find someone to share your next conversation with. Make language exchange and international friendship easier with Langmate.
